American Institute For Boys and Men
Richard Reeves
Author of 2024 book Of Boys and Men; Why the Modern Male Is Struggling, Why It Matters, and What to Do about It
Jackson Katz
Mentors in Violence Prevention (MVP) is one of the longest-running and most widely influential gender violence, sexual harassment and bullying prevention programs in the world. Founded in 1993, MVP has inspired countless students and people of all ages to challenge and change social, cultural and institutional norms that support abusive behavior.
The documentary Tough Guise 2 from Media Ed critically examines the way masculinity has been constructed over time in a way that increasingly puts society at risk, especially males who are statistically more likely to be both the perpetrators and the victims of violence. A detailed examination of the documentary is at my post here.
Scott Galloway
From Vox (2024) Are men okay? Our modern masculinity problem, explained. There’s a growing body of evidence that men are falling behind. You can see it in education, in the labor market, and in the data on drug overdoses and deaths by suicide.
From No Mercy/No Malice (2023) Boys to Men
Boys start school less prepared than girls, and they’re less likely to graduate from high school and attend or graduate from college. One in seven men reports having no friends, and three of every four deaths of despair in America — suicides and drug overdoses — are men. I’ve written about this at length here, and about how it relates to declining birth rates here.
The Crisis of Masculinity from The Growth Equation (2024)
- Education: There is a significant gap in high school graduation rates and college enrollments. Women graduate college at significantly higher rates than men in every state in America.
- Mental Health: the suicide rate for men is four times that of women.
- Intimate Relationships: Nearly half of male teens have never dated, almost double the rate of previous generations.
- Friendships: According to survey data, thirty years ago a majority of young men had over six friends. Today, it’s half of that. Meanwhile, fifteen percent of young men report having no close friends.
We’ve got to offer a better alternative—a path forward that provides young men quality nourishment for their foundational psychological needs... And a big part of that is on us as a society. We’ve done a poor job of outlining what that path looks like.
We need a more realistic and positive view of masculinity.
Of course, we’re talking in broad generalities here. But it’s vital that we offer counter narratives for young men that are in juxtaposition to the ones peddled online by right wing grifters, but also to those that deem high-school football as being “toxic.”
Instead of talking about being an alpha, high-T lion, or whatever other pseudoscientific garbage proliferates on the internet, why not refocus our attention and create mental models for masculinity that include the following qualities:
- Being a good father, brother, friend, and husband.
- Having integrity and honor.
- Caring deeply about others.
- Showing real toughness based on equanimity and embracing challenges instead of a fake and performative machismo that avoids feelings and emotions.
- Pursuing meaningful work and showing up consistently.
- A path toward mastery and modeling a diverse array of career paths, from elementary school teacher to welder.
- Being a protector of the weak.
- Showcasing your physicality in competitive pursuits (if you are so inclined), and doing so within the rules and ethics of those competitive pursuits.
In essence, we need to model what it means to be a decent human being for half of population that, on average, is born programmed to have higher testosterone than the other half of the population.
The Mask You Live In
From the team behind "Miss Representation," The Mask You Live In is a 2013 documentary that explores America’s narrow definition of masculinity and the harm it causes boys and men. View the trailer here.
The website is here including:
Raising Boys With a Broader Definition of Masculinity from the Atlantic (2019),
A psychologist explains how a strong relationship with a parent or teacher can help boys be their true selves, even when those selves don’t fit within narrow cultural norms.
A psychologist explains how a strong relationship with a parent or teacher can help boys be their true selves, even when those selves don’t fit within narrow cultural norms.
From Scientific American (2019), How to Fight Toxic Masculinity
The code of toxic masculinity requires that men are dominant over everyone else, have no needs, show no emotion and are always #winning
there is a difference between traditional masculinity and toxic masculinity: There is nothing toxic about working hard, providing for one’s family, winning at sports, or being loyal to friends. Most importantly, there’s nothing toxic about wanting to be respected. All humans want to feel respected—we all want to know we are valued, recognized, and affirmed.
How to Raise a Boy; I’m not sure what to think about what my dad tried to teach me. So what should I teach my sons?
This is a great article from NY Magazine's The Cut (2018) about how to raise boys.
A Call to Men is an organization designed for coaches, teachers and parents on how to help mentor boys to a healthier version of masculinity.
Speaking Frankly: Raising Boys, a documentary from CBS focuses on the issues with masculinity and redefining it in a way that is both realistic and healthy.
This article from the NY Times called, Teaching Men to be Emotionally Honest.
How is boys’ performance in school related to masculinity?
What research does social psychology provide about males at a young age (1-5yrs) and at older ages (teen years)?
How does the growing number of women on college campuses affect men?
What are some ways that colleges specifically, and society in general, can help males have a healthier self-identity?
Judy Chu
A CONVERSATION WITH DR. JUDY CHU ON MASCULINITY AND HUMANITY
Psychology Today explaining the danger of "Boys must boys"
The Goodmen Project is a website dedicated to helping men including this piece on the danger of Boys will be Boys.
From Gillette:
https://thriveglobal.com/stories/gillette-ad-campaign-best-a-man-can-get-we-believe-toxic-masculinity-progress/And from Dove:
Although PURE is mostly a residential treatment program, their life skills program is a model for what may help young adult males.
Life skills programs for young adults
Life Skills Programs for young adults (17-20) years old can offer the following ways to help stimulate your child in a positive direction and give them a second opportunity at bright future:
- Therapy through emotional growth. A young adult displaying a level of resistance to school or work will need to address the underlying causes in therapy. This is sometimes easier after leaving the comforts of their home environment outside peer influences.
- Building encouragement through a positive peer environment. Expressing frustration and anger with your child will likely make them feel worse and increase failure to launch behaviors.
- Structure. Help your young adult find the right balance between staying busy and having down time.
- Goal setting through mentorship and internship programs.
- Accountability through basic life skills of chores, hygiene, financial literacy, culinary skills, healthy diet decisions and more.
- Enrichment programs that can range from caring for animals, woodshop, landscaping, farming, arts and music, community volunteer work, gardening and more.
- Education – from finishing high school to starting college classes or enrolling in vocational training, every student has an opportunity to learn.
Life Skills Program can equip your child with coping skills to deal with adversity and change that real-life can throw at them, as well as help students identify who they are by what they can do, rather than what they have done.
From Loyola Twitter:
Becoming a Man (BAM)
In 2001, the Becoming A Man (BAM) program was launched in Chicago to help young men navigate difficult circumstances that threaten their future. Program founder Anthony Ramirez-Di Vittorio created a safe space for young men at Clemente High School to openly express themselves, receive support and develop the social and emotional skills necessary to succeed. Now in its 19th year, the BAM program serves more than 8,000 youth in 140 schools.
Today’s youth face many obstacles. Community violence and other stressors create at-risk environments where making positive life choices can feel impossible. It’s easy for young men, particularly from disadvantaged communities, to become angry and afraid. It’s easy for them to follow negative influences that lead to serious trouble. It’s easy for them to drop out of school.
In 2001, the Becoming A Man (BAM) program was launched in Chicago to help young men navigate difficult circumstances that threaten their future. Program founder Anthony Ramirez-Di Vittorio created a safe space for young men at Clemente High School to openly express themselves, receive support and develop the social and emotional skills necessary to succeed. Now in its 19th year, the BAM program serves more than 8,000 youth in 140 schools.
No comments:
Post a Comment