Friday, January 30, 2009

Dear Kevin,

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This is in response to a recent article appearing in the student newspaper. In the article, a student named Kevin details his definition, method and frequency of "hooking up."

I read about your hook-ups in the statesman today and I want to write to you about your ideas. Let me start by saying that YOU ARE A MIMBO - that's right, you are a male bimbo. Just so you know, recent research shows that most teens do not engage in behavior like yours. Instead, hook-ups happen with a limited number of partners. For example, an average student who hooks-up might have just one or two people who he/she has hooked up with - not the whorish number you are bragging about. However, let me explain that in fairness to you, it is not totally your fault. Here's why, using a sociological imagination.
First, you probably watch a lot of tv and movies and listen to a lot of music (probably rap, right?). Yeah, I thought so, there is far more sex on tv and in the movies than in real life - FAR more. It is especially prominent in media marketed to teens. This creates the idea that masculinity is related to sexual encounters. You are being influenced by the media to assume that you need to be sexually active to be cool, successful and masculine.
Secondly, the age of puberty/sexual maturity has been gradually getting younger. We know this for a fact over the last few decades. We are not sure why, but teens are experiencing sexual physiology at a younger and younger age. However, socially and emotionally, teens (especially you, Kevin) are maturing at an older and older age. So physically your body is ready for sex, but mentally and emotionally you are not. Think about the average teen 80 years ago - he/she likely didn't go through puberty until 14 or 15 years old and he/she would be working a full time job by 18 years old. Millions of teens were fighting overseas in World Wars I and II. They came home and supported themselves. They were emotionally, socially, financially more mature than you are. This meant that they handled the feelings of attraction and sexuality much differently than you do.
Thirdly, The average age of marriage has been rising and rising so the ability to wait until marriage has gotten harder and harder to do. Now that being said, hopefully you realize these dynamics have changed and therefore you can deal with them in a way that promotes your growth as a person. Right now, however, you are giving in to these sexual desires - partly because of your biology and partly because of your exposure to media and yet you are obviously not able to handle this responsibility. This what animals do - they give in to their biological urges and to the way they are trained. Promote your humanity - your ability to control these is what makes you human. Not to mention, you are creating a reputation (mimbo) for yourself in your group of friends, the school and the community. Furthermore, you are putting yourself at risk for stds, becoming a father, and for emotional baggage that could prove to be a real burden for yourself.

1 comment:

  1. I'd like to agree with you on this. Kevin is an idiot and I hope he doesn't think that he represents the entire teen population. Not all men are testosterone fed animals that crave after women planning out the night to "get some." Personally I think that if Kevin made a time table and everything he's a creep, one who plans on his "victories" like a rapist waiting in the bush. I do think that kids are more and more influenced by the media to become more sexually active. Just look at Hannah Montana for instance. Shes a estrogen charged girl that constantly craves boys. Who admires and watches her? 5-9 year old boys and girls. Should they be worried about the opposite sex? no, they should be worried about whether or not santa is real.

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